Can’t tell her so, leaving it here.

Sorry, for just going away and, thanks for ghosting me.

the days nowadays don’t feel exciting

like the days you were there with me

when we listen to some old songs on loop

when my failed attempts make you laugh

when I annoyingly told you every moment to take care of yourself

see the god must be making these things up

always get back to me claiming I was never enough

never enough to give you the time you needed

never enough to give the care that you needed

but, this time I tried,

I gave my best to everything

and, never took you for granted

even, how could I?

you always reminded me of the uncertainty

the time we spend together

even if you don’t feel anything

the miss you told me after the day we met

and, the hug which I couldn’t have

make me feel something

after a long time, I thought of sharing my happiness with someone

how could I say I don’t feel for you anything?

when nobody wants to be with me,

you asked me to stay with you

every time you made an effort,

I pushed myself to never turn you off.

I never was a person who loved late nights calls,

but, with you, those calls feels likes

the thing I adore for years

even the silenced shared with you over calls,

made me in peace, remind me of love

the melancholy sunflower

I am a guy who just freaking wants you to be mine and just mine. I don’t want to share you with anybody, and, when you reject my calls and messages, it made me realize I am not good enough.

When I talked with you, I had this thing in my mind. The thing is if the sadness she has is still there when I am with her then, what is the reason for me being there.

What am I?

When I feel that I am not improving your life and your mental and physical health is just heated up and get drained then, me actually in your life isn’t good. I am toxic and I am just not brave enough to tell you that you’re mine and I am taking care of you. And, everything’s gonna be alright.

I just afraid of losing you but, even the coward me is there, just take care of yourself and your loved ones.

I had a really good time with you. Thank you.